Monday, July 5, 2010

I think I've said all I have to say...

It's been awhile but I'm back. Hooray! I'm not sure where I want to go with this one but sometimes when you can't speak out loud writing will help get out the words you want to say. I think the title of this one should be "life" but it's such a big word with more meaning and undertones then a simple blog could express. I've been working on it for awhile so brace yourself boys and girls this one may be a smidge sappy (yes, I know totally unlike me:))

I wonder sometimes if I went left down the road instead of right. What path would the other way have taken? I wonder what really matters when all is said and done. I've been thinking lately, mainly about life. It's been made painfully clear the last few years just how fragile and short this time on earth we have. Losing people has never made sense to me, whether they go home to Jesus, they walk out or simply drift away... one thing I know is that it hurts and healing is one of life's big mysteries. When the world spins so fast how do I hold on? Do I turn to Jesus and pray for answers? I haven't always, but I'm learning how to seek him when I need him and even more in times when I don't really want to need him. The beautiful part is that I don't have to ask for him to love me, he already does. He has my precious life and heart in his hands. I've seen what God can do, I've seen him answer prayers, I see the pretty stars he puts in the sky each night and I see him put people in my life that I couldn't do without. It really is all in his hands, forever. He answers my prayers, not always with the answer I necessarily would have chosen but he answers them, always. He's answered hopeless dreams of mine, and said no to plenty others.

God gave us all one life here, he promised a life beyond what I can imagine once my work here is done. I want to make the very most of life here. It isn't about the small stuff, it's about what really matters. Love. Love isn't perfect, it's a crazy ride that is hard work. I wouldn't want it any other way. I want to compromise and make my life with someone better then it would be without them. I never want to look back and think, I didn't try hard enough. I want to see beauty in the eyes of the ones looking at me. It's not about having a perfect life, not every detail matters when all is said and done.

I want to hold on so tightly to the ones I love and I want them to see me for the beautiful lady God specially made. I'm not perfect and I don't belong on a pedestal. God didn't make me perfect and he certainly doesn't put me on a pedestal. I want to be in a place where I am seen for the person I am. I've failed at a lot of things in my life, but I am most proud of the parts that I've succeeded at. I never want my life to be easy, I want to be challenged. I want to love with my whole heart and see people for who they really are. In exchange I want to be adored and loved, at the end of the day it doesn't seem like it's a big request.

I want to become one of those people who takes life and embraces it. No, I want to grab it, tightly and hold on for dear life. I want to see the good in people, always. I will be a person who listens and then speaks. When God speaks I will listen and try my best to remember. I want to love wholeheartedly the people God has blessed me with. I want to trust in his plan for me, I really do. Why is it that trust is one of the hardest things to do?

I have an amazing family who love me because they want to and not because they have to. They aren't offended by my honesty and opinions (and if they are they haven't told me!). They stand by me no matter what road I choose to walk down. They see me for the beauty in which God created me to be. The friends that I have been so blessed to be around continue to amaze me with their kind words, encouragement and support in every crazy choice I've made. I value their honesty, as telling me the truth is the way to my heart. I love that they have families, they have all turned into beautiful mothers with children that can only be described as a precious gifts from God. I will forever be grateful to be part of a circle of women who continue to make me strive for a small piece of the lives they've created.

When all is said and done I want a life full of love, beauty, hardships, happiness, laughter and trust. And I believe it's in my hands to grab onto the life God has for me to make happen.

I love my life, all of it. But yet I still want more...

Saturday, February 13, 2010

The "Love" Day

And my thoughts about it. I've never been one to be "in love" with Valentine's Day, I've had some great ones and some not so great ones. I've found the one that I enjoyed the most happened to be the worst (Don't worry it doesn't have to make sense to you). It started out wonderful and ended in a fight with tears everything the day of love should be right?! I loved the person that I shared that day with and when I look back into my memories it is one of my favorite memories. No I'm not going to share it with you, there are somethings meant to be tucked in my heart only. But now we come to the present... I am 30 years old, single and quite honestly I've never been happier. I've got friends married with kids and I'm happy for them but I'm also thankful that portion of my life hasn't started quite yet but I do look forward to it.

On to my feelings about Valentine's Day...I think it's "great" there is one day a year where people are "forced" into buying you overpriced flowers, candy, and cheesy Hallmark cards and restaurants that are over crowded... really I do. I've been told that for some people it's a much needed day, and I totally respect that it's just not for me. I don't need to have a day when it's likely my expectations won't be met. And should anyone decide to do something lovely for me I will be touched, really I will be and quite frankly shocked:) What I'd love more then anything is for you tell me you love me everyday, give me flowers when you've heard I've had a bad day and candy because you thought I'd enjoy it. It doesn't have to be on February 14th, it could be April 1st, June 7th, September 17th any day pick one or pick them all it doesn't matter as long as you love me every day.

This is my wish for a "perfect" Valentine's Day someday... write your own card, give me yellow roses, hug me a little bit longer then you normally would, tell me you love me and that's it. Seriously that's it, no pressure no confusion as much as I want the one in my life to believe I'm complicated (and I know I am sometimes) there are some parts of me that are easier then you might expect.

Some might call me bitter, jaded or lonely...trust me when I say I'm none of those. I am happy to be around people who care about me, I love having old friends back in the picture and I love the ones who have been around for as long as I can remember. And so on February 14, 2010 I hope to be surprised by someone special in my life,but I will not be broken if the day goes by with nothing... I can always count on my Dad to be my Valentine!

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Hi 2010, I'm happy you are here!!!!

Oh what a year 2009 has been!!! I truly wish I had done better of writing happenings down so that I could remember them all. If only my Mom wrote my diary for me! The "biggest" event this year for me was that I turned 30. Which is sort of silly since it really didn't faze me much. Perhaps it's because when I buy alcohol the guy behind the counter's jaw drops when he see my age on my ID and the proceeds to tell me I am beautiful, young looking and he hardly can believe I'm 30. Seriously if he didn't work at the liquor store I would consider marrying him. Or maybe it's because it really doesn't matter to me what age I am as long as I'm happy, healthy and funny. I have enjoyed my life thus far, I have been blessed more times then I can even remember. I am surrounded by wonderful family and loving friends. I will forever be amazed by the love people have for me, it's important to remember on those down sort of days. This year I have done everything from laughing to crying like a little boy does and everything in between. I have been surprised, loved and blessed. Oh the other big things is selling the condo that I have called home for over 5 years, it was a tough decision that had to be made but really is for the best. Now we all know how I resist change and honestly that part of me might never change but I am excited and hopeful for what 2010 has to bring. Or I could say crap it's another new year what else could possibly go wrong?!:) But I won't, it's not part of my cheerful, sparky self.

I adore my sister, she makes my world brighter with her text messages, funny emails and late late night calls. I am so proud who she has become. My Dad has been so faithful and loving especially the last few years, I honor, love and respect him more then he knows. Mom has been Mom, I am so grateful for her unchanging ways. In this world of constant change she never changes. She loves me, accepts me and tries to understand me. Step Dad Bill, who knew when he married my Mom that I'd be getting another man figure in my life. He is wise, does his best not to overstep his bounds and constantly entertains me. Along with Bill came his family, while this year has given more ups and downs then any of us were prepared for I'm grateful to know them. I am amazed by Step Sister Erin, her husband Issac and their 2 girls. Erin is loving, encouraging and hilarious. She stands firm in what she believes in, and having a loving happy accepting family is at the top of her list. I am also grateful for Issac, seriously he may be one of the coolest people I've ever met. And those girls are rays of sunshine with giggles and hugs a plenty. The Wahl family, they truly are my second family. Tasha, Erik, Krystian, Julian and Harley. I could and should go on and on about how much joy this family brings me. I love this family. My friends, it's funny how after all these years these now women are part of my core heart. All in different places with families of their own, and yet when we all come together it's a peaceful feeling. I am fortunate to have wonderful people in my life. This year brought people back into my life that I had missed, God works in his own ways.

And so enough with the super sappy stuff, onto what I hope for and plan to do with the New Year!
I hope to take the time to listen to what others are saying
I will continue to be funny no matter what the situation, seriously.
I am going to try and become more patient, or just learn how to be patient
I will ask questions even when there are no answers
I am going to work on trusting others, whole heartily
I will try my best to embrace change and not spiral into panic mode
I am going to try new things and do my darnedest not to make a face about it
I will try my best not fear the unknown
I will open my heart and let love in
I want to do only things that matter
I am going to fit back into my size 2 clothes, I swear
I will be happy, hopeful and cheerful

Well I think I've bitten off more then I can chew, but all these are important to me. And I am also pretty stubborn and if I think I can't do it I am motivated to prove myself wrong:) One thing that I will continue to remind myself of is that life is precious, you only get one shot at it I don't want to miss a single opportunity or take a chance when I have it. I'll leave you with this, and a wish for a Happy New Year for you all!

I am thankful that God is faithful even when I'm not, he's a gentle man in my life that I really should spend more time with. A friend wrote this, and I think it's fitting... PERFECT TIMING. Sometimes God will make clear that our answer is delayed because the delay will further His work in our own hearts or in another area. Sometimes He gives us no reason at all. Never grow complacent or stale. Never lose sight of the upward call of God. His timing is ALWAYS perfect. May this always be something I remember when I feel my lack of patience set in.


Friday, September 11, 2009

Dear...

So I started this letter awhile ago, it began as a letter to my future husband to give him some insight about "Erica" since I'm a handful. But since he's no where to be found and I'm days away from 30 I'm putting it out to the universe and give ya'll a chuckle, lets see if you really know me. I'm sure there are some surprises, but if you know me then it's more to entertain your socks off.

Dear whoever reads this,

Let me start by saying I'm a handful, seriously. What you are about to read may give you sweaty palms and question all your beliefs but I'm worth it, really I am.
  • I am one of the funniest people you'll ever meet, really the things I say sometimes surprise me. It might not be appropriate, right or even make sense but it will stick with you like underwear on your ass on a hot muggy day.
  • I don't like my feet being touched, but I will always get a pedicure and my toes will always look cute. Look, don't touch. You can try but you'll be sorry. Consider yourself warned, oh and if you don't notice how cute my toes are after they've been done you'll hear about it.
  • I love the beach, but I hate the water and the sand. I know it doesn't make sense, it doesn't have to it's the way it is.
  • I don't like leftovers, yuck. On the odd chance I order a dinner and somehow manage to take it home I won't eat it. It's wasteful I know, but I don't like them.
  • Flowers, I LOVE them. I've made it easy for you to know what flowers to get me, I have a tattoo on my wrist and should there be an occasion I feel I should have gotten flowers and I don't get them my wrist will be in your face.
  • I love TV I will watch just about anything, with over 300 channels there is always something on.
  • I'm a nut, I do my laundry in order every weekend. If I skip a weekend, it's really confusing.
  • I still shop at my T-Town Von's, I love it there. They know me, I know where everything is why change? Yes, there is a Ralph's down the street I tried it once.
  • I heart country music, don't hate. I don't plan on not liking it anytime soon.
  • Voted for George W. Bush, twice. I'd vote for him again if I could.
  • I hate the dentist, he's a nice guy but I hate him. Sedation for cleanings?Yes please!
  • Football, this is a new love of mine. I just love the game.
  • Naps, where would I be without them?
  • Driving (I'll blog about this further later) I'm a good driver, seriously don't mess with me. And for the love of God use your blinker, it's not just a stick car folks made for looks it has a purpose!
  • I hate the "F" word, I don't use it. But I sure do like all the others!
  • Crying, I do this from time to time. Commercials, movies, words, people or for no reason at all. Don't worry I'll be fine.
  • I'm not needy, I love my me time. Give it to me and you'll be happy.
  • I've lost people I've loved dearly, we can talk about it when I'm ready.
  • Hugs, this has changed over the years. Let's hug it out, I'm ready now.
  • Singing, nope sure can't carry a tune but it won't stop me... shower, car, while cooking if I know the words chances are I'll sing it.
  • I love celebrity gossip, love it!
  • The way a man smells, Love it... so much so that I wear men's deodorant.
  • I'm always late, and don't try telling me an earlier time you'll just have to wait longer.
  • My Dad is amazing, I go to him for everything.
  • I love the air on with the windows open.
  • Greece, I'm going there someday.
  • I'd rather be happy in love then rich.
  • Exercise is the devil, I hate it. I'll do it, and it might be the best show you've ever seen.
  • Patience I don't have much I try to use the little I have wisely.
  • If I tell you I'm fine I am, if I'm not you won't even have to ask you'll see it on my face.
  • My Mom drives me to drink sometimes but being around her makes me a better person she's that awesome.
  • I'm always hoping for a knock on my door.
  • I am a cake snob, I don't do store bought cake and yes my nose scrunches up when it's offered. There isn't anything like a homemade cake. I really don't mean to be rude.
  • I'm clumsy, not graceful at all.
  • Remembering every random detail is something I'm good at.
  • My sister is a bright light in my world, adore her.
  • I can't see far away, so if I don't have my glasses on and you aren't standing right in front of me I'm not being rude I just can't see you if you are trying to say hi until you get closer.
  • I'd rather have a beer then a glass of wine.
  • Drama, can't stand it I want a repellent for it.
  • My heavenly father, I'm forgiven I'm loved and I was created by him for good purpose and I'm forever grateful and constantly still learning.
  • Kids, love them. I want to start with one and see how it goes...
  • Pillows, I have way too many but I know where each one goes if one is out of place I can't sleep.
  • I was adopted I have no desire to ever meet the lady that gave birth to me. She did enough by giving me life, I'm grateful for the choice she made by giving me to Mom and Dad.
  • Meral, she's my doctor I go see her all the time for everything.
  • Loyal is how I would love to be described as.
  • Shoes I love them, but I'm happiest in my flip flops.
  • Talking on the phone isn't for me, text me, email me or call and your number will show up. And don't leave long messages when I don't answer, I see your number I'll call you back.
  • Mornings are tough, I'm good after about 20 minutes.
  • I am almost always cold, and I love my Uggs.
  • Adore me.
  • I love the holidays, I'll tell you I hate my Birthday but I really love that the day is all about me. And yes my Birthday is a holiday, the government just hasn't caught on yet.
  • Weather, I love it... no I'm obsessed with it. And the news too, love watching the news!
  • Gum, I always have it... and about 4 different kinds in my purse.
  • Don't try to take me camping unless it's at a hotel with a down comforter, if you try you'll be sorry nature and I don't work well together.
  • I'm pretty tough, but be careful words and actions will break me.
  • Little things mean more to me then grand gestures.
Well if you made it this far I give you a gold star, you must really love me!!! I could go on but I'll leave some for next time, and also my computer is so hot right now it's burning my leg.
So until next time, God is great beer is good and people are crazy!!!!


Tuesday, September 1, 2009

19 days 3 hrs 46 mins...

Ahhh where to start... well how's this it's September 1st, which means in 19 days, 3 hours and 46 minutes (as of 8:18 p.m) I'll be 30 years old. Yep this little girl is all grown up! I thought it would bother me, and maybe at 5:45 a.m (which is when I was born, Mom don't forget to call) it will be real. I've loved almost all 359 months, 1, 562 weeks, 10,938 days, 262,532 hours, 15,751,933 minutes or 945,115,983 seconds and counting of it really I have. I've been blessed with amazing family, fantastic friends and people who constantly keep me entertained, happy, supported and loved. 30 is a number that doesn't scare me, I'm planning on embracing it and celebrating it.

On to other things... well August was an interesting month. I asked for a better August then July was and in many ways it was. Since I don't believe in putting family issues out over the internet I'll keep this part short. My eyes and heart have been opened to see people for who they really are. I've seen some ugly but I've honestly seen far more beauty because of the uglyness. I am grateful for the wonderful people God chose to place in my life, it's ironic being adopted God's really been in charge from the beginning like really in charge. He knew where to place me, and has never let me down by putting these amazing people in my life. When he takes away it's for a reason, he always has a good reason even though I'm not always meant to understand. I'm grateful for the family who believes in me and stands by me without hesitation.

Something new, I've decided it's time to get involved with something that isn't about me... Young Life!!!! It's been on my heart for months, I had such a wonderful experience and was blessed with amazing people through it. Shout out to my peeps.... Tasha! That I've realized it's time to give back to a group that gave me so much. More to come, but it's out there and I couldn't be more excited about the opportunity!

Now onto funny things, since that's why I'm on here:) I had a major bug problem this month, I swear it's like I lived in the forest or went camping and brought ALL the mosquitos home. Now you all know me, I don't camp unless it's at a hotel with a down comforter. Seriously. I really don't know what happened maybe Emma let some friends in, who knows but I was eaten alive! In about a week I had 3o or so bites, Emma was pissed they got to her too. I even got 2 antibiotics because of one of them. So I ventured out on the advice of my very "unhandy" Dad to Lowes, now people if you know me and my camping you also know that the thought of going into the Man Stores such as Home Depot & Lowes sends me into a state of panic similair to how I feel about Wal-mart. Now I don't know why this is, maybe since my Dad never took me I never built an immunity to the store. But I really have NO business being in the Man Store, nope not even to look for a handy husband. But I went in order to bomb my condo, sounds scary but it wasn't well sort of. Now I went to Lowe's, must say I liked it better then Home Depot I can compare it to shoes. Home Depot is a pair of Reefs while Lowes is a nice pair of heels. Now I picked up my bug bombs, sort of handy they came in a pack of 3! Genius since I have 3 rooms to bomb:) Now the scary part was evacuating Emma to take her for a day at Grandpa's house. She doesn't like to travel not even a little bit, poor thing stayed in her carrier which she is far to big for now for the entire day!!!! But the scary part was setting them off... now I am one person, I had to set 3 off and run like hell. So I first took Emma in her carrier and set her on the front door step with my handbag and everything else I needed for the day. Went into my bedroom, set it off holy crap was that scary!!!! Stuff starts flying... ran into the guest room, holy hell then ran into the living room and set the last one off... seriously it should come with a warning label. "Caution you need more then one person to set off all 3 at the same time". But I did it!!! Picked up Emma from Grandpa's and came home to a bug free house!!!! I cleaned, vacummed and dusted... NO MORE BUGS!!!! I love success stories:)
I've been sick now for a few days, some say it's stress but I'm on the mend! I missed two days of work, boy tomorrow should be fun:)
Amy came into town for a day, I love seeing her. She really has become more then I could have imagined. I'm so proud of her and love her oh so much.
Dad, Bill and my step neice Reya had birthdays this month... Such great people celebrating, I love them all.
I'm learning to play cards and it's funny I really like it, well of course I do I'm pretty much a old lady in almost everything else I do:)
It's hot, like really hot... I am so thankful for A/C. I love summer really I do, but I'm looking forward to a San Diego winter.
I'm in the process of changing my jazzersize membership to one closer to home, sorry for all you east county folks no more attempts to stalk me:) But I'm not giving it up, people say I'm looking great and I feel better then ever!
All in all August was good to me, I look forward to September it's MY month!!!! So until next time kids God is great, beer is good and people are crazy!!!

Friday, August 14, 2009

Writing funny takes time...

Ahhh blogging it's tougher then it looks. I sort of wish I could just take all my facebook status updates and make it into a blog. That would be convenient... seriously, my facebook status updates are pretty entertaining and up to date! So I need more time to write up my funny life stories... in the meantime kids I give you the best email EVER. Seriously, these will cause you to cry from laughing so hard... and while most of you can imagine me thinking then saying almost all of these sadly they aren't mine but it brought me great joy reading them again... enjoy!
  • I wish Google Maps (tom tom, etc) had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

  • More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can’t wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that’s not only better, but also more directly involves me.

  • Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

  • I don't understand the purpose of the line, "I don't need to drink to have fun." Great, no one does. But why start a fire with flint and sticks when they've invented the lighter?

  • Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.

  • I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

  • The letters T and G are very close to each other on a keyboard. This recently became all too apparent to me and consequently I will never be ending a work email with the phrase "Regards"again.

  • Do you remember when you were a kid, playing Nintendo and it wouldn't work? You take the cartridge out, blow in it and that would magically fix the problem. Every kid in America did that, but how did we all know how to fix the problem? There was no internet or message boards or FAQ's. We just figured it out. Today's kids are soft.

  • There is a great need for sarcasm font.

  • Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the f*** was going on when I first saw it.

  • I think everyone has a movie that they love so much; it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

  • How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

  • I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

  • I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

  • The only time I look forward to a red light is when I’m trying to finish a text.

  • A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.

  • Was learning cursive really necessary?

  • Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say".

  • I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

  • Answering the same letter three times or more in a row on a Scantron test is absolutely petrifying.

  • Whenever someone says "I'm not book smart, but I'm street smart", all I hear is "I'm not real smart, but I'm imaginary smart".

  • How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

  • I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers!

  • While driving yesterday I saw a banana peel in the road and instinctively swerved to avoid it...thanks Mario Kart.

  • MapQuest really needs to start their directions on #5. Pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

  • Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

  • I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

  • Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

  • I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

  • Bad decisions make good stories.

  • Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!

  • Is it just me or do high school girls get trashier every year?

  • If Carmen San Diego and Waldo ever got together, their offspring would probably just be completely invisible.

  • Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, I get so incredibly nervous? Like I know my name, I know where I'm from; this shouldn't be a problem....

  • You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren’t doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

  • Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after DVDs? I don't want to have to restart my collection.

  • There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

  • I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

  • "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

  • I hate being the one with the remote in a room full of people watching TV. There's so much pressure. 'I love this show, but will they judge me if I keep it on? I bet everyone is wishing we weren’t watching this. It's only a matter of time before they all get up and leave the room. Will we still be friends after this?'

  • While watching the Olympics, I find myself cheering equally for China and USA . No, I am not of Chinese descent, but I am fairly certain that when Chinese athletes don’t win, they are executed.

  • I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Darnit!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

  • I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

  • I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my iTunes.

  • Why is a school zone 20 mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...

  • Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

  • It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood.

  • I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

  • I think that if, years down the road when I’m trying to have a kid, I find out that I’m sterile, most of my disappointment will stem from the fact that I was not aware of my condition in college.

  • Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.

  • Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I’d bet my a$$ everyone can find and push the Snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time every time...

  • My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

  • It really pisses me off when I want to read a story on CNN.com and the link takes me to a video instead of text.

  • I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

  • I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

  • I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

  • The other night I ordered takeout, and when I looked in the bag, saw they had included four sets of plastic silverware. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, took a second to think about it, and then estimated that there must be at least four people eating to require such a large amount of food. Too bad I was eating by myself. There’s nothing like being made to feel like a fat b@st@rd before dinner.
 

Saturday, July 25, 2009

The one with the walker and life...

So this last week has been a little drab, uneventful and that's what I needed after the last two weeks. But I do have some funny stories as always... let's see I'll start with Sunday night the fam, my Dad, my Mom and I all go every Sunday night to Grandma's house in La Jolla. We love it, once a week just hanging out, chatting, drinking tea and eating animal crackers while Dad watches 60 Minutes. One thing missing is Amy, but we talk about her enough it's like she's there. Well this last Sunday, as always Grandma orders food from the kitchen downstairs. She always has way too much food, never room in the fridge, I don't eat anything because I'm a "picky eater", but Mom and Dad do but they certainly don't go for the food. It's just Grandma is just such a hostess at heart she doesn't know how do to anything else. So anyway the kitchen was short staffed, so I jokingly asked if she wanted me to go down and help in the kitchen, I was caught off guard when she said "yes, that would be lovely". What she meant was she needed me to go down and pick up the trays of food. I laughed then said "I'd be happy to". She called informed them her beautiful granddaughter (she's so good for my self esteem) would be right down. She was told there was 2 trays, and I might need help. I said don't worry Grandma I got this, I shouted to Mom "Hey, wanna come help me"? She just looked at me, until Grandma offered her walker. You know the one old folks use to get around that have a seat and baskets pretty fancy stuff. Well this peaked Mom's interest, I laughed hysterically because me pushing a walker in an old folks home is just funny. I politely declined the walker, dragged Mom to help me with ALL the food for just 3 people mind you. Down the elevator we went, giggling about "the walker", I kindly told Mom that at some point I would be responsible for picking out her very own walker:) She told me to stop making her laugh, as it causes her to cross her legs in order to prevent "an accident". Depends anyone?:) We get to the dining room, to find 2 itty bitty bags of food... 2 ITTY BITTY BAGS of food. I could have picked it up ALL this food in the dark, one handed, backwards in my sleep. Oh Grandma... she's a funny wonderful over prepared worrisome lady whom I absolutely adore. I love our Sunday nights with her, my family means everything to me and gets me ready for the week ahead. I wish everyone could know my Grandma she truly is the light of our world, the stories she tells, the way she falls asleep in the middle of stories and dinner, the way she talks about my Grandpa who she loved with all her heart, her need to make sure her family has everything before she does. Over the years she's let me learn from her, I now make sure she has what the family and she needs. She's passed the hostess with the mostess torch on to me and I love her for it.

After the surprise run in from last week...I took a mental health day and gathered all my strength to face the past, it's amazing what the waves and sand at Coronado can do for your spirit. I let myself make peace, fondly remember the past that I blocked out a year and a half ago, I will not be scared, I will not be sad, I will remember my past, I will lovingly and gently put it in my present to become the person I want to be. I will always think of my friend, I miss her all the time, so many things everyday remind me of how much I love her. I hope to honor my promise to her someday... I was told by someone amazing that you can never say never. For now my socks are on:) I don't know what my future holds, but for the first time in a long time my hope and faith have been restored.

The rest of the week was just OK, I went to Jazz... I am no longer human I'm a dancer. I love it. I got checked out twice by 2 different very east county big truck john deer sticker toting guys. At this point I'll take what I can get. Also saw two police men... two very good looking east county police men. I might change my opinion of east county.... naw not likely:) Edward Cullen came to town, he didn't call but I understand he was busy. My dishwasher didn't leak, and the a/c has been working like a trooper. I didn't have any bugs to kill with 409 or Readers Digest. I started reading a book, "The Hello Girl" it's a good read. Next I'm starting "The Story of Edgar Sawtelle", Oprah selected it. So it must be good. There is nothing good on TV, nothing... good thing I like to read.

That's all for this time kids, next week should be more lighthearted...
God is great, beer is good and people are crazy...